Why am I moved by stories of Eden?
What does this 'lovely sadness' mean?
Am I just a traveler, who cannot remember home?
Why do I cry sometimes in dreams?
Billy Crockett
I feel that way constantly. We always sing of our home in heaven, but so often I feel so detached from those songs. It's as if I'm supposed to remember this place called home, but I don't. And sometimes it makes me feel left out. And right now, I'm feeling displaced. Is it possible that I could love Jesus more than my husband, my son, my mom and dad? Is it really possible that when we get there, we won't miss the other things? Because I really love my people here, and I guess I'm a little distracted by that. Friends, I hope you'll excuse me for being candid, but these are my true to life thoughts, and I guess if that means my faith is less than, then maybe that's something to pray for.
God, please give me small glimpses of heaven so that I may long for the day that you've created for me. And please show me the joy that comes with this life, despite where I may be located. I know that your son had no place to lay his head.. Why should I?
I'm afraid some of my more prayerful posts are becoming depressing. I hope that isn't the case but I'm trying really hard to be more honest with myself and with others about who I am in Christ. Which is nothing really in the grand scheme of things. But all I can do is pray that through the honesty, I may become different, and better.
2 comments:
I don't spend a lot of time thinking about heaven, but I sometimes wish really badly that Jesus would come down and spend time with me in person in the flesh. I know he'd have a thing or two to say to me, but I don't care. I just know he could make it all alright, the way everything feels right in the world to a young child when their father's around.
I guess what I'm trying to say is that home is where He is.
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